With so many of my favorite commentators and content creators being censored, cancelled and deleted by Big Tech these days, I was beginning to feel a bit ashamed of myself for not having made the grade. I mean, for quite some time I’ve been sharing plenty of stories spotlighting the cornucopia of leftist progressive corruption and stupidity sweeping the socio-political stage, and doing so with as much vim and vigor as I could muster, and still I was avoiding the attention of the Zuck’s crackerjack Fascist group-think enforcement dweebs. My self-esteem as a conservative loudmouth was taking a dive… and frankly, I was concerned. Actually, I was almost “offended” for being left out, but I wasn’t there quite yet… guess I’m not as easily offended as your garden-variety liberal blissninnie.
So I began troubleshooting my mediocre performance, looking for clues as to why I continued to avoid the axe. Maybe it was because I occasionally use big words the average liberal doesn’t know… did I need to dumb down my rants, keeping them within the meager 10,000 words often cited as the average vocabulary of a native speaker? Were my arguments too weak, my delivery too bland… was it my penchant for the ellipsis?
Trolling the Left and excoriating them for the tyrants they are is fun in and of itself, of course, but still, a man likes to feel that he’s marking his territory, flying over the target, exposing uncomfortable truths and fanning flames of derision. And for a wanna-be conservative blogger, the gold standard these days is to be censored, shadow-banned, cancelled, deleted or otherwise marginalized by the social justice warriors at the helm of these infernal platforms we use every day.
Well, today all that changed… sort of. I was busted for not following FB’s sacred “community standards”. The problem is, I can’t for the life of me understand what the hell these Silicon Valley idiots are whining about.
I popped onto FB today, and was greeted with this promising alert:
Now first off, not only do I not buy advertisements on FB, I never “go live” either, so I’m not exactly feeling the sting of Zucky’s whip here just yet. But I was starting to get a little excited that all my left-baiting mouthing-off had finally captured FB’s attention, that some pithy word-salad of mine had finally put me in the Zuck’s crosshairs as “a dangerous individual”… maybe even an “organization” — and thanks to all my hard work carefully stitching eviscerating words together, I was finally suspended (I was hoping for a complete and final deletion of my account, actually, to save me the bother later).
But when I saw the minuscule 6-word comment that had apparently precipitated my fall from grace, I felt like the dog on the old RCA logo, quizzically hearing his master’s voice… except ‘the master’ wasn’t making any sense.
“A chip off the old block.”
That’s it? My cardinal sin was that somewhere, sometime, I had commented to someone about something by saying, “A chip off the old block”? Honestly, I have no idea when, to whom, or to what I was responding when I tossed off that well-worn riposte. And *THIS* is what caused me to lose two privileges of which I never take advantage anyway? Imagine my disappointment.
But there was still hope. There was a blue ‘Continue’ button. I eagerly clicked through. Here’s what I saw:
So far, I’m not impressed. <click>
Huh?? How exactly does “A chip off the old block” suggest any of these “dangerous things”? Is this just FB’s ineptly written algorithm confusing a chip off a block as somehow pertaining to serial murder?! <click>
Ah, now I get to respond! Yeah, that’s “what I’d like to do” right about now. Relieved to learn that the Zuck will “use my feedback to make improvements on future decisions”, I selected “Disagree with decision”, and clicked Continue.
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